Archive for the A Category

Aftermath: Genesis

Posted in A with tags on March 11, 2009 by cam127

Cam Says:

Upon the viewing of Aftermath: Genesis in which I purchased off of a seller at the Fangocon in Chicago over the weekend who of which had been extremely helpful in terms of picking movies out. He had a selection, some PAL, some region one, some that didn’t seem to be DVD’s, out of these movies one caught my eye, mainly due to the cover. I expected a name like Dr. Giggles or something similar but upon closer inspection I realized that what I was staring at wasn’t so much a movie, as it was a pure work of perfected and shocking art.

Genesis is a movie that seems to have a history behind it in the underground section of horror lovers, although dwelling in it myself from time to time I have never scratched much behind the surface. I have seen bootleg versions of Guinea Pig: Flower of Flesh and Blood, among with others that have shocked me in a way that not very many movies have shocked me before. I am a fan (and I am sure that in writing of this will lose readers) of Eli Roth and Saw movies. Yes I said it, movies, plural, not because they are good movies, they most certainly aren’t with plot holes to get lost in, yet they give the people a reason to run to the R rated horror movies and move ever further from the PG-13 classification that has plagued the nearly decade of horror enthusiasts. Aftermath Genesis provides the lovers of true horror and those of art house style movies, a release from reality. This movie makes no attempts to conceal it’s viral and mesmerizing journey into the dark pitted tunnels of human nature.

Along with Salo or 120 Days of Sodom this movie sets itself apart in a hard way of classification because the movie does not define itself, more so defines the viewer. Salo accomplishes this in mainly one, narrow minded way, not to say that anyone involved with Salo was anything close to narrow minded, yet the ideas set behind it only show a few aspects of human nature. 120 Days of Sodom provokes the viewer into a state in which shows the darker side of man, the sexual acts that make you consider if you yourself belong to such fetish groups. Yet even after all of this sexual deviance and torture the characters in this film are put through there is only a satisfying end to the antagonists in the film itself.

Yet after all of this is taken into consideration we only see bits and pieces of the movie portrayed. In itself, we only see the movie. Which is a sad thought to consider because the story behind the movie is that of epic proportions. Imagine Van Gough drawing a wonderful landscape, trees mirroring themselves on the lake, yet the people are drawn as stick figures with pure white complexion. This is Aftermath: Genesis, this is a work of true art.

The first short story ranges around five to seven minutes long, which is something of a strange black and white film set in a classroom. The character is plagued with visions of a pyramid with an eye in the center piece, just as the dollar bill has. Watching this short gives you definite incentive to view the others, but does not fulfill, even remotely, the want for the story to go on. It’s a bit of an oxymoron because the first story gives you the need to watch the others but does not fuel any fire that hasn’t been started by word of mouth or reviews for the same title.

The second story is that of an autopsy doctor. Here’s where I get personally confused, somewhere somebody gained the knowledge that it is a high up medical doctor, placing first in his class, as far as I can tell it’s just hear say. Nothing hints towards this and well… due to the lack of any dialog, nobody claims that he is. The doctor is left alone and there is a prolonged scene of necrophilia. Unlike many other summaries or plot spoilers, this movie doesn’t need any alerts (Except for the last short which I will keep a secret for your viewing) because the movie does not make any attempts to surprise you in the endings of each of the movies, but rather force you to watch scenes so awe inspiring and shocking that it questions your very morals as a human being. The story ends with that… nothing else is to be said, hinted towards, no redeeming moments where police officers arrest him, no suspicion of forged medical documents… nothing. Because of this ending, because of the feeling that life has been taken so quickly and yet an ironic act of procreation made on a dead body gives the whole movie a feeling of something you cannot quite describe. The closest you can come to accurately describing such a film is reality. Watching this short is as if watching the last episode of the last season of a TV show and seeing the last ten minutes. So much behind the story, background information is lost with the viewing, but gained just as well. The strangest part of it all, your completely satisfied with each and every ending, especially this one.

The third and final short runs around the same as the second, a modest 30 minutes. This story is the best of the three, this story connects with the second one (if I’m not mistaken) with the same woman who had been raped after the grave. Though this time the story takes the perspective from her husband, he isn’t taking the death so well, the guilt and mourning is causing him to make a statue of her in memory. The highly detailed piece of art begins to grow of drop of blood, the husband, while at first is somewhat concerned, merely washes the statue off. The statue begins to crack, causing blood to seep from it’s slits. I will not ruin the rest but I will tell you that it is somewhat of a shock and really turns you on your ear. The last short needs not any introduction as I have given it all in the previous paragraphs. You must see this last short to believe it and nothing else will compare.

Viewing these shorts is like taking a look into the mind of a true genius. Watching these short films is like peering into life before death, life during death, and life after death from separate points of view. Understand that I take great pride in viewing a movie that I would ever consider giving my highest rating to, especially one that not many people have heard of or isn’t regularly available. The only other thing I can say about this movie is purchase it, do not bootleg the shorts, you must see this on your TV, you must own these films. Putting a price, in terms of value, on these movies is like putting a price on a new born baby, the beloved family pet, or if none of these suits you I will just say that this movie has no price, no value, it is priceless. Like an original painting from a famous 1700’s artist, it is something that may have a price on it’s head whether it be black market or public fare these movies will live down as some of my favorite shorts. I will make no attempt to describe anymore but to beg you to purchase these movies, however, wherever you can.

Movie:

It’s a classic movie, wonderful in every form. This isn’t a movie for everyone but for who it appeals it it’s one of the best if not the best in the genre.

Special Features:

Something I didn’t touch on much at all, there isn’t much there but what is there is of decent quality.

Price Value:

I paid a mere 15 bucks for the movie but if I had known I would have paid much more for it.

Art Direction:

Extremely artfully crafted in a way that rarely does any movie even come close to touching upon.

Grade: 92

American Psycho

Posted in A with tags , , , , , , , , on February 19, 2008 by theroboticdan

Dan says:

Take a young wealthy wall street socialite, mix in some obsessive killings, and add a dash of Huey Lewis and the News. What do you get?americanpsycho.jpg American Psycho Pie.

Christian Bale is Patrick Bateman in the role that put him in the spotlight and erased any idea of him being a paper selling, street dancing Newsie. Without American Psycho, would we have Bale as our beloved Batman today? I highly doubt it. We get to see an amazing range from Bale, as he goes from cool-as-a-cucumber hipster to I’ll-take-a-bite-out-of-your-calf psychopath in a matter of seconds.Why is it that upbeat new wave 80’s hits are the perfect soundtrack to brutally twisted murders?

Something about their ridiculously positive and catchy beats makes American Psycho so unique in it’s deranged vision.

American Psycho is directed by Mary Harron, whose IMDB resume is painfully short. There is this one scene where it seems Patrick is walking behind a woman, stalking her as a potential kill. Then both suddenly come to a dead stop at the same time. You’re left wondering why they stop simultaneously, until the scene ends and you see they were at a crosswalk, waiting to get to the other side of the street. So simple yet so clever.

What sets American Psycho apart from any other thriller is that it brings you into the mind of Bale’s deranged character, so much so that you cannot be entirely sure if anything you are seeing is actually happening. Does he really blow a cop car sky high? Are there really closets filled with bodies? How many times can he confess what he’s done aloud and not raise suspicion? Is he seeing things, or is theamericanpsycho2.jpg apartment complex so worried about maintaining their reputation that they would cover up a murder? Did his lawyer really meet with a man he had “killed”, or can his lawyer not tell these similarly dressed and titled business men apart? Did you just watch a movie, or was it a series of vignettes?

Because of this, the film offers a great post discussion. Yet at the same time, ultimately putting question of whether this was the real life, or if this was just fantasy, puts the viewer in a landslide with no escape from reality. Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see…

Sorry, I love Queen. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I’ve heard in rock. It’s an epic meditation on intangibility. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument.

All around, its an interesting trip into the human psyche, one that is thought provoking and meticulously created. Is this all one big ripoff, like a giant dream sequence? Maybe, but its one hell of a ride. Watching American Psycho is like living with massive OCD for two hours, where the compulsion… is to kill.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some videotapes I need to return.

Grade: 88

Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters

Posted in A with tags , , , , , , , , , on February 5, 2008 by Schuyler

Schuyler says:

Aqua Teen (TV) > Aqua Teen (Movie)shake1.jpg

The reason for that is the fact that the ADD style of humor lends itself to 11 minute episodes much better than it does to 2 hour feature films. Audiences who enjoy Aqua Teen can’t sit still for THIRTY minutes to watch a real TV show, much less in an uncomfortable movie theater seat in Somerville, MA. I will explain what I hated about this movie in an acrostic poem:

D imensions (3) – The crappy 1980s 3-d throwback graphics were a terrible eyesore and didn’t accomplish a humorous purpose
R etarded Walter Melon watermelon character. Apparently Chris Kattan is down to the last rung on the totem pole when it comes to begging for work: Adult Swim

W hen the writers decided to try and fit every single former ATHF villain into the movie. Ambitious, but TOO MUCH.
E mory and Oglethorpe’s lines just weren’t as funny as they normally are on the show
I saac Hayes III playes a plantation owner’s voice for a few seconds. Shaft can fuck himself with how his crazy Scientologist ass screwed over South Park studios. I hope he never works again.
R idiculous revelations: Frylock is a woman, the diamond on the back of his head is a VCR player, Frylock is Dr. Weird’s mother, and the Aqua Teens were born from a Tina-Fey-sounding-burrito, etc., etc.
D r. Weird and Steve SHOULD NOT BE MAIN CHARACTERS. THEY SUCK. THEY ARE NOT FUNNY. Apparently C. Martin Croker has some compromising photos of the producers, because he got WAY too much of a part in this film.

What makes Aqua Teen Hunger Force (TV) funny, isn’t present in Aqua Teen Hunger Force (Movie)

Grade: 71

Airplane!

Posted in A with tags , , , , on February 3, 2008 by jharoldson13

James says:airplanesplash.jpg

What more needs to be said about one of the greatest comedies of all time? This classic disaster movie spoof follows the story of a man and his stewardess as they attempt to land a pilot-less plane, while the guy from “Unsolved Mysteries” talks a lot and tries to help. But then his dog humps a guy, and I’m usually laughing too hard to listen.

Any movie that features a little boy asking a little girl how she takes her coffee, to which the little girl replies, “Black, like my men,” is clearly in a different league of hilarity. With more cameos than you can shake a stick at, including Kareem Abdul-Gom Jabbar (if any girls got that reference, marry me), and…other people, this is truly a comedy classic. If you haven’t seen it already, go out and rent it. Or better yet, buy it. Show “The Man” that we won’t tolerate abysmal comedies like “Epic Movie” anymore. We need a return to form, and familiarizing yourself with an example like “Airplane!” is a great place to start getting yourself some fucking culture.

It’s the perfect movie to sit down and watch with your parents, who no doubt remember it fondly from their distant childhoods. Do what I say, and go see this movie for yourself. At least three thumbs up for this masterpiece. The only downside I can find is that, like all good things, it must come to an end. And I suppose some of the jokes are a bit out-dated at this point. But fuck it, a little un-PC goodness goes a long way in these troubled times.

Grade: 92